Friday, October 15, 2010

The Days Of Wine & Roses


I was about 12-13 years old when I first saw the 1962 movie "Days of Wine and Roses", starring Jack Lemmon and Lee Remick. The film depicts the downward spiral of two average people who succumb to alcoholism and their attempts to deal with the addiction. Even as a child, the movie struck a cord with me and, despite its triumphant yet tragic ending, I've watched it several times over the years. At this point, you're probably wondering what any of this has to do with Whitney Houston, aren't you? Well, just indulge me for a few minutes and you'll see...

In the movie, public relations man Joe Clay (Jack Lemmon), meets and falls in love with a secretary by the name of Kirsten Arnesen (Lee Remick). Kirsten is a "teetotaler" until Joe introduces her to social drinking. Reluctant at first, after her first few Brandy Alexanders, she admits that having a drink made her feel good. Despite the misgivings of her father, who runs a San Mateo landscaping business, they get married and have a daughter named Debbie.

Joe slowly goes from the "two-martini lunch" to full-blown alcoholism. It affects his work and, in due time, he and Kirsten both succumb to the pleasures and pain of alcohol addiction. Joe is demoted due to poor performance brought on by too much booze. He is sent out of town on business. Kirsten finds that the best way to pass the time while he's away is to drink, and drink a lot. While she was drunk one afternoon, she causes a fire in their apartment and almost kills herself and their child. Joe eventually gets fired from the PR firm and goes from job to job over the next several years.

One day, Joe walks by a bar and sees his reflection in the window. He goes home and says to his wife... "I walked by Union Square Bar. I was going to go in, and then I saw myself, my reflection in the window, and I thought, 'I wonder who that bum is?' And then, I saw it was me. Now look at me. I'm a bum. Look at me! Look at you! You're a bum. Look at you! And look at us. Look at us! C'mon, look at us! See? A couple of bums!"

Seeking escape from their addiction, Joe and Kirsten work together in Mr. Arnesen's business and succeed in staying sober for a while. However, the urges are too strong and after a late-night drinking binge, Joe destroys an entire greenhouse of his father-in-law's plants looking for a stashed bottle of liquor.

After commitment to a sanitarium, Joe finally gets sober for a while, with the help of Alcoholics Anonymous, a dedicated sponsor, and regular AA meetings. When Joe tries to help Kirsten, he instead ends up drinking again and goes to a liquor store that is closed for the night. When the owner, whose home is on the second floor, yells to Joe to beat it because he is closed, Joe breaks into the store and shoplifts, resulting in another trip to the sanitarium.

As Joe sobers up, he is greeted by his AA sponsor, who says that Joe has to keep sober no matter what, even if that means staying away from Kirsten. Joe also explains that, to some alcoholics the craving for alcohol can overcome all else, and points out that because Kirsten was a chocolate lover, that may have been the first sign of an addictive personality.

Joe eventually becomes sober for good and becomes a responsible father to his child while holding down a steady job. However, Kirsten begins disappearing for long stretches of time and picking up strangers in bars, hopelessly lost to alcoholism. When Joe tries to make amends with his father-in-law by offering him an envelope full of cash for the damaged greenhouse, Mr. Arnesen lashes out at Joe for getting Kirsten involved in the alcoholic lifestyle.

One night, after Debbie is asleep, Kirsten comes to Joe's apartment to attempt a reconciliation. However, Joe sees that if he were to give in, it would lead to the same self-destructive behavior of what he did at the liquor store. Joe explains to Kirsten: "You remember how it really was? You and me and booze... a threesome. You and I were a couple of drunks on the sea of booze, and the boat sank. I got hold of something that kept me from going under and I'm not going to let go of it. Not for you. Not for anyone. If you want to grab on, grab on. But there's just room for you and me...no threesome." Sadly, Kirsten admits that alcohol has taken over everything in her life and she can't imagine never taking a drink again. She leaves as Joe has to fight the urge to go after her. The film ends with Joe watching Kirsten walk down the street from the window of his apartment with a "BAR" sign flashing in the background.

Needless to say, the movie painfully reminds me of the life and times of Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston. If the cover story on the latest issue of the National Enquirer is true, Bobby and Whitney bear a striking resemblance to Joe and Kirsten. It was reported yesterday that Whitney's ex-husband, Bobby (who has been sober and drug-free for quite a while now), is planning to stage a drug intervention to try and save Whitney. Sources say that Bobby now blames himself for the superstar singer’s various addictions and is recruiting her loved ones, and Janet Jackson, to step in and help out.

"Whitney is struggling with her addictions and Bobby blames himself for her problems," a friend told the tabloid. "They did drugs together for years, but Bobby got clean and now he sees it as his job to help Whitney beat her addictions." He told me, "What’s happening to Whitney is all my fault. I stayed in the party life too long and I should have helped her a long time ago."

Bobby and Whitney’s 17 year old daughter, Bobbi Kristina, apparently begged him to help her troubled mom. "Bobbi Kristina told her dad that she thinks Whitney is still getting high, and asked him to confront Whitney about it," the source revealed. "Bobby went to Whitney and said... "Look, baby, you can’t get this monkey off your back alone. I will help you." He promised that they’d beat her addictions together. Bobby knows that most of the people he has asked to intervene, especially Whitney’s mom Cissy Houston, don’t like him and blame him for Whitney getting hooked on drugs. But, he’s hoping they’ll put those feelings aside long enough to help Whitney."

Some people feel that you should never believe what you read in tabloids and, for the most part, I'm inclined to agree with them. But, even tabloids report the truth sometime... just like a liar tells the truth sometime. So, just in case this recent story about Whitney is true, I feel that she is going through what I like to call, a "Footprints" period. Despite everything that has happened to her over the last 20 years, I know that God still has His eye on the sparrow and is watching over her... and, He will continue to carry her until she is strong enough to walk on her own again.

I neglected to mention before that the first time I saw "Days of Wine & Roses", my mother watched it me. She had seen it before and thought I might like it too, so she actually suggested that I watch it. When the movie was over, my mother told me something that I will never forget: "You should always be mindful of what you encourage other people to do... what could turn out to be just 'a phase' for you, could turn out to be 'a life wasted' for the other person." I kinda-sorta understood what she meant at the time, but it didn't really resonnate with me until I was much older. So, please keep Whitney in your prayers... just in case.

1 comment:

  1. Great Post Ladybug, i have seen that movie and thought its ending was so depressing. Hoping Whitney's ending will be brighter. Thanks for sharing!

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